Infertile. Who, me?: And One....

And the picture says it all. After 3 months of Depot Lupron, another SHG, and another Endo Biopsy, lots of waiting.....IVF#5 is finally underway.

It has taken a lot of patience to wait these 3 months out. Been lapped by so many pregnancies and oops pregnancies and thrown in my face I'm pregnant but don't want this baby ordeals. Just a lot to deal with. But now I can finally feel proactive at working towards getting pregnant.

At today's baseline I had 10 antral follies on the right and 6 antral follies on the left and a small cyst on my right ovary that they are not worried about. They did test my E2 and FSH level again but when my nurse called she didn't have the numbers so she said she would call me back tomorrow to give me the numbers.

So tomorrow morning I will do Lupron, Gonal F and Menopur and tomorrow night I will do Lovenox, Gonal F and Menopur. My RE also wanted me to start taking Caltrate which has Calcium and Vitamin D in it. He said this once he found out I would be on Lovenox for an extended period of time, so I guess it may effect my calcium level or bones or something.....not sure.

First appointment will be on Sunday which will be stim Day 5 just for blood work and everyday after that is blood work and ultrasounds.

My TTC History

December 24, 2009 - Our Miracle is born!
IVF #5 - March 2009 - Am I seriously doing this again....
Dec 2008 Starting 2 months of Depot Lupron
IVF #4 - July 2008 - BFP - Chemical @ 5w6d
Started my Self-Researched Vitamin Regimen May 12, 2008
IVF #3 - Feburary 2008 - BFP - Chemical
IVF #3 - January 2008 - On hold due to cysts - now into Feb.
IVF #2 - November 2007 - Poor response converted to double IUI - BFN
2nd Laparoscopy Surgery - October 2007 - Removed 9 Cysts and Stage IV Endo
Changed to new RE - want to shoot my last one in the foot! - Sept 2007
FET #1 - August 2007 - BFN - Transferred 2 Blast - 2 still frozen
IVF #1 - July 2007 - BFN - 16 retreived, 10 mature, 9 fertilized with ICSI - 5DT - 2 Blasts, 4 - Blast on ice
Laparoscopy Surgery - March 2005 - Stage IV Endo found
Officially started Trying - June 2003

Wait by Russell Kelfer

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate . . .
And the Master so gently said, "Wait."
"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word."
"My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign."
"You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
As my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting for what?"
He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine . . .
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run."
"I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint."
"You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence are all you can see."
"You'd never experience the fullness of love
When the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart."
"The glow of my comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last."
"You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I'm doing in you."
"So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though often My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still . . . Wait."

13 comments:

Mon said...: Good luck, T, I hope this is IT for you !!; March 10, 2009 at 11:07 PM
RB said...: I'm praying that IVF #5 is the ONE!; March 10, 2009 at 11:08 PM
Pepper said...: Yup. Heparin / Lovenox leach calcium from your system. Good call by your RE.

Congratulations on moving forward and may Five be fabulous!; March 11, 2009 at 1:21 AM
Anonymous said...: Best wishes, Hope all goes well and that you will be blessed at the end of this IVF with the baby you so diserve.; March 11, 2009 at 7:42 AM
Flower said...: Only thinking positive thoughts for you (smile); March 11, 2009 at 9:32 AM
Michele said...: Sending positive thoughts and big virtual hugs!!!; March 11, 2009 at 12:28 PM
Ms. J said...: I am really hopeful for you, now that you have the right doctor and a more-tailored protocol!; March 11, 2009 at 12:36 PM
TheDales said...: I'm sending happy thoughts your way!! Good luck!!; March 11, 2009 at 1:37 PM
Christina said...: I can't believe its here!!! I hope this is it! Love ya!; March 11, 2009 at 3:33 PM
Yolen said...: The very best of luck to you both!!!; March 11, 2009 at 6:18 PM
Anonymous said...: Good luck!; March 11, 2009 at 6:43 PM
Emily said...: Sending good vibes your way for a successful #5!!!

LFCA; March 12, 2009 at 7:10 PM
Billy said...: Good luck!
Hope IVF #5 brings your charming baby into the world :-).
(and can so relate to being bombered by pregnancies all over the place! [though lukily for me not the latter, not people who don't want the baby]).
Here from L&F; March 12, 2009 at 7:15 PM

Infertile. Who, me?

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

And One....

13 comments:

So in Love!

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